music, photography, random thought, writing

sister winter

i love winter. when i lived in wyoming, winter was considerably more “involved” than it is in texas. but the fact remains; winter is the season of death. no matter where you live.

certainly i am no lover and harbinger of death. “slayer” is not carved into my arm. but i am obsessed with what inevitably walks patiently beside death: the opportunity for renewal.

where there is ruin, there is hope for a treasure. ~ rumi

there was a time in my life when my heart froze over – it took so many years to thaw. sufjan’s song sister winter reminds me of this time.

it seems to be a beautiful and poignant letter of explanation to his friends. he tells them that his heart has returned to sister winter, and is as cold as ice. the weight of sadness is almost too much to bear.

he goes on to describe in filmic detail a failed relationship. it cuts deep into the listener.

but what i love most about sister winter is the end of the song. it builds and builds… and when all of this scar tissue and raw emotion culminate and burst forth, breaking free from the frost, sufjan belts out an intense, “and my… friends, i’ve… returned to wish you all the best… and my… friends, i’ve… returned to wish you… a… happy Christmas!” the ice melts, and love flows again.

it ends with bittersweet undertones. sustained strings in unison fade.

may spring come! but not before we have proper time to mourn our losses.

photography, random thought, travel, writing

keeping austin… something, something

ahhhh… major sigh of relief. i am sitting outside at my favorite coffee shop, flipnotics, uploading a recent magazine assignment, john coltrane playing quietly in the background, sipping my favorite french organic medium roast. it’s dreamy. partly cloudy, 70 degrees. i drove in this morning, so i could get a few last-minute work things done before enjoying the next week in my favorite city in texas – austin.

“i used to live here, you know,” i think jealously to myself. i then bitterly justify why i no longer live in austin, “well, things have changed here anyway.” but that’s not the full truth.

yes, austin has changed. a lot. i can see the new high-rises that tower above town lake. all those damned new york and LA transplants! someone let the secret out about ten years ago, and since then, just like every other cool place in this fair country, it has been slowly californicized.

but i digress. bitterly. so… the real reason i don’t live here anymore is that there simply isn’t enough work for me. i tried to make it here after college. but the work was scarce, and competition fierce. don’t get me wrong, i love competition, but the situation down here is rediculous. a young guy making his start is better of in a larger market where he can establish himself. so I sold out and went to dallas.

and so i’m a little sad. but then i look around… and i remember the good times i had here. i used to spend 8 hours a day, six days a week here at flips. before i had a laptop, i would study, roll my own cigarettes, read thoreau, daydream my time away. it was a time of free thought and incredible amounts of creative expression. granted, much of that expression was destructive, and i no longer “express” in those ways, but it was good. a time that was needed… to get me where i am, and to help me see where i want to go. but austin is like that; it can serve as a helpful transition for many of us.

austin is a place for learning. sometimes for learning about how weird all of us really are. i also learned about what i am not. and that took a long time to come to terms with, but i am happy to be able to say that now.

i miss this place. even when i’m here. so maybe more than a location, for me it was an era. but i feel like i can appreciate it more now for what it is; awesome, and weird as hell. maybe now i can move back and usher in a new era…

family, photography, random thought, writing

post spring-chicken fashion

my friend, Amy, works at an upscale retirement home as an event coordinator. she loves her job.

i’ve always been fond of wiser folks than myself (which happens to include approximately 87% of the general world population), so naturally those whom have double, triple, or even quadruple as many years as i do often capture my attention.

so when Amy asked me to come shoot her “annual senior fashion show”, i saw a great opportunity.

the faces lacked no character. their hearts were still warm and beating. and their dignity seemed larger than mine. i guess it grows with age.

they really enjoyed themselves, but they weren’t aloof to the fact that there was an element of novelty to those of us younger folks in the audience. and i don’t think they cared. they know what it’s like to be young and ignorant. they’ve earned confidence and self assurance.

surprise, surprise. so i got a little sentimental and reflective at the old-folks home.

my last-remaining biological grandmother passed away two weeks ago, and though it was expected and in many ways a blessing, it’s sad see another sojourner leave us. but the flip-side of that is that she made the summit. and it makes me happy to know that she had a pretty good time doing so.

so i left the retirement community with a full cup. and i get the feeling that we are missing out on something that you can only learn when you’re time’s almost up. unfortunately, and fortunately, i don’t know what that is.

i think i’ll try to hang around the elderly a little bit more, and maybe they’ll give me a heads-up.

all images © andrew r. slaton | photographer 2008

photography, random thought, travel, writing

give reviving

mexico is one of those places that is inspiring and heartbreaking at the same time.

i had the unique opportunity to visit monterrey last week to shoot for my church and mission to the world (mtw). it certainly was not what i expected. but then again, i’m not completely sure what i expected.

honestly, my thoughts are still pretty jumbled, and i have yet to produce a cohesive story for this trip… but people keep bugging me for pics, so here are a small fraction of the photographs taken!! more thoughts to come…